Nagging - A Strict No No ......
Are you a Nagging Parent?
Do you constantly Nag your child?
Do you want your child to be self-disciplined?
Do you want your child to be self-motivated?
Do you want your child to be independent?
For these qualities in your child, you nag your child. You as a parent want to see that your child has the correct behavior towards friends, family and acquaintances.
Since they are not up to your expectations, we want to correct them in our way. But we have to realize that kids learn from their mistakes. No child will ever be picture perfect and we have to give them scope to do mistakes.
Nagging is only a temporary solution, which works for some time only. The more positive interactions between the parent and child, the less likely it is that the parent will need to nag the child in order to gain compliance.
It is more than chances that a strong bond between the parent and the child will form for a long time bonding.
First we need to know why positive affirmations are important :
A lot of negativity is around us. Though we cannot see it but our brain can detect it. Positive affirmations is one of the way to refrain us to think negative and to stay positive.
So, this article goes out to most of the parents with positive things you can say to your children, so that – in the long run – you won’t need to nag them constantly.
Here’s the list:
1. “I’m grateful for you.” Children feel special when they know you’re thankful that they’re a part of your life.
2. “What do you think?” Ask this question to show that you value your children’s opinions.
3. “I enjoy spending time with you.” Children and teenagers behave better when they know that you love them and like them.
4. “All of us make mistakes.” Say this instead of harshly criticising your children for accidental mistakes. Please don’t scream and shout at time for accidental mistakes. Trust your child.
5. “You’re special to me.” This phrase will help to fill your children “ Love Tank”. Love is one of the most word in English Language which can do wonders.
6. “I appreciate it when you . . .” For example, you might say, “I appreciate it when you set the table for dinner and when you take care of your younger brother / sister.”
7. “I trust you.” Children and teenagers who feel as if their parents trust them are more likely to become trustworthy and dependable.
8. “You’re getting better at . . .” When you notice your children’s progress, they’ll feel encouraged and motivated. A single sentence of appreciation does wonders.
9. “Have a good day!” This is a simple way to start the day on a positive note when you say goodbye to your children in the morning. Don’t find faults in the morning even if it is a recurring mistake. Speak to them in the evening in a friendly manner. If it is recurring mistake then be a little strict.
10. “Let me think about it.” This is a better alternative than instinctively saying no to your children’s requests (assuming the requests aren’t too unreasonable). This also gives time to the child to give it a thought.
11. “What happened here?” Ask this question instead of assigning blame or jumping to conclusions, e.g. when you notice something is broken or damaged in your house.
12. “It looks like you’re in some thought, can you tell me about it / can we discuss ?” This is an effective way to get your children to open up.
13. “I’m sorry.” When you’ve made a mistake, be humble and apologise.
14. “Your practice is paying off / you are improving day after day.” Children and teenagers appreciate it when their parents observe that their efforts have yielded results.
15. “How did you do that?” Don’t highlight on marks alone, check the overall improvement. This question helps your children to focus on the process instead of the outcome.
16. “What’s one interesting thing that happened in school today?” By asking your children this question, they’ll be more likely to open up as compared to you asking, “How was your day?” Parents don’t ask about what they ate in their break time,, this is a boring question to ask everyday.
17. “What one thing you did good for others today?” This emphasises to your children that doing good goes a long way. Making them global citizens and being nicer at heart starts at an early age.
18. “I’m sure you can do it.” This statement works wonders. Say this to your children to give them a boost of confidence. The child’s trust factor is you so go ahead and boost his confidence level.
19. “You decide.” Children learn to make wise decisions by making more decisions, not by following the instructions of authority figures. This doesn’t have to be age specific. Some children start taking decisions from an early age but some children need a certain level of push.
20. “How do you feel about that ………. A particular situation ?” This question will help your children to become more emotionally self-aware. The level of self confidence also increases.
Despite what you may think, children grow up enhancing their own personality. We as parents, we should highlight on making them responsible individuals and better global citizens. Rest trust your children.